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Christmas Volume

I was there,
where it smells damp
like in a cellar.
It’s black, dark and stinking.
I don’t know reason
why I love.
Selfish laugh
is chasing me.
Pain –
hidden in laughter.
Flesh and blood hurts.
I’ve got to stay alive.
I’ve got to beat.
There’s still time left.
Dreams – Insanity?
Insanity – Dreams?
Who am I?
I’m naked.
I was built on a rock.
The wind touches
my undressed body.
I’m cold.
I took off my cast-offs.
Wound is bleeding.
Stretched, spat, naked.
I shout.
My dry lips burst.
Can’t you see?
I’ve learned to love!
It hurts!
You are born in me
in pain.
I’m waiting between
two spasms.
Love hurts.
Birth hurts.
I cry out.
The wound bursts.
Let you be born!
I relax.
It’s good you’re crying.
So I know you’re alive.

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